Two friends came over, drunk, and talked until half past three
Intended to go to bed and looked outside while pissing
It was bright outside already and little birds had begun to chirp
Hadn't ended a day this way in a long while
I wanted to write a diary, but I was too sleepy to write
To decide which events of the day to write about
Or not (to write about) is always difficult
There is not one thing that I cannot live without writing
But why don't I feel at ease if I don't write anything?
After pissing I slept about five hours I forgot all about the dream
Got up thus and so write poetry instead of diary
That's right, I remember now, one of the friends got drunk and
Claimed repeatedly that he respects his wife but does not love her
Another friend was trying to list the names of five authors he dislikes but only able to give three names
We all ate cherries from the deep blue glass bowl
It is hard to believe a day ended that way, but it did
What's left (and what's lost too) is not only words
Poems cannot exceed words
Only human can be more than words
Last night I was laughing to tears but
Today I have forgotten the reason for laughing as if it never existed
—Shuntaro Tanikawa
(English Translation by Naoko Smith)
いつか土に帰るまでの一日
（『世間知ラズ』より 1993）
谷川俊太郎
二人友達が来て三時半まで飲んでしゃべっていった
寝ようと思って小便しながら外を見たら
外はもう明るく小鳥が鳴き始めていた
こういう一日の終わりかたは久しぶりだ
日記を書きたかったが眠くて書けなかった
一日の出来事のうちのどれを書き
どれを書かないかという判断はいつもむずかしい
書かずにいられないことは何ひとつないのに
何も書かずにいると落ち着かないのは何故だろう
小便してからぼくは五時間ほど眠り 夢はすべて忘れ
起きてこうして日記の代わりに詩を書く
そうだ思い出した 友達のひとりは酔って
妻を尊敬しているが愛してはいないと繰り返し主張し
もうひとりは嫌いな作家の名を五人あげようとして三人しかあげられず
みんなで藍色のガラス鉢から桜んぼを食べた
一日はそうして終わったのだと信じがたいがそうはいかない
残ったのは（そして失ったものも）言葉だけじゃないから
詩は言葉を超えることができない
言葉を超えることができるのは人間だけ
ゆうべぼくは涙が出るほど笑ったが
笑った理由を今日はきれいさっぱり忘れている
『世間知ラズ』 is one of my favorite books. <3 Your English is quite good here. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Chris-san! Yeah, 世間知ラズ is good. I like this one particularly. I have a question for you. Do you think "the earth" is appropriate for the translation of 土? I was thinking today, whether it's better to translate it as "soil" or "the ground" or maybe not "the earth" but just "earth"? I feel like if I used "the earth" here it sounds like I'm talking about a planet, but of course that's not what Tanikawa meant, you know?
DeleteWell, I slept on it, and the more I think about it, "the earth" couldn't sound any worse. It sounds like we're all going back to the planet earth. I think "the soil" is the better word choice in this case, so I changed it just now.
DeleteNaoko, sorry I didn't reply sooner. I think you're right to change it to "soil." "Earth" wasn't bad, and as long as it isn't capitalized one knows you aren't talking about the planet Earth, but it's best to get rid of that confusion completely if possible.
DeleteThat being said, I'm not so sure about the title. I don't know how I would translate it, but it sounds awkward in English. Have you thought about any other versions of the title?
Yeah one of my friends said that the original title I put, which was "A day to return to the earth someday" was better, but my tendency is to be as close to the original, and I wanted to change "to" to "until" to translate までに, you know? I'd love to know how you would translate the title! Give it a try and share with me! :)
DeleteAt the moment the best I can think of is "One of the Days Before Eventually Returning to the Soil."
ReplyDeleteTo me what is implied in the Japanese title is this: "My life is merely a span of time before I eventually die and return to the soil, and this poem is about one of the days in that span of time." Of course, this is hard to express in succinct, clear and poetic English. The まで is of course important, but when you say "a day until...." it sounds like you mean "there is only one day until [something happens]." This is obviously not what the title means. Rather, the title indicates a specific day which happens to fall in the time span (of one's life) before returning to the soil.
Of course I could be wrong. Maybe my Japanese is failing me.
Wow, yeah, I see your point and it totally makes sense! I may change it to something like..."A day on the way toward returning to the soil one day"
ReplyDeleteThanks for your wisdom, Chris-san, I always appreciate it!
No problem. I really love thinking about these sorts of problems. And yes, I think that "A day on the way toward returning to the soil" is more accurate. I will be posting my own translation on my blog soon, by the way, so please check it out :)
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