You always tell me what I want to hear, my darling

It was late Wednesday night.  I was at Greyhouse Coffee shop, talking with my boyfriend online with tears constantly running down the cheek.

"You are going to end up being the most popular teacher there.  Believe me about that.  Your students are really going to *like* you.  They will look forward to your class and look forward to talking with you in Japanese.  You will make them smile and laugh and feel happy, like you do with everybody.  People *like* you.  You don't have to try hard to make them and if they like you, they will want to learn from you.  You will find a way to teach on your own.  *Your* own way, and it will work."

I am still sobbing...and he continues.

"Trust me, I know you.  You are like a cat."

I look up for the first time and say "A cat?"

He said,

"Somebody can hold you up way high, and drop you, and you will always hit the ground feet first, all four feet, smiling.  I really love you.  You are a very special person, and nothing can stop you when you set your mind to it."

Earlier that day, I had to perform a teaching demonstration to a couple of faculty members and other TA staff.  Because I was inexperienced and nervous and all, I did poorly on that, and I was becoming negative about everything.  I simply did not think I should have been a teacher to begin with, so I was crying and saying that this was end of the world.  

My boyfriend is always very good at calming me down, when I am all worked up like that.  He knows and tells me what I want to hear the most.  After I stopped crying, he did not forget to tease me.  He asks, "Do you remember when you were trying to get your driver's license?"  I say yes.  He says, "Remember how you cried and how hard it was?"  I say, "Oh did I cry for that???"  He laughs and says, "That is what you will be saying later about this." 

He is very true.  I cried when I failed my Japanese driver's license test four times, but it really wasn't a big deal.  I can laugh about it, and now it has become a good story to tell.  

He also told me this,

"When you are teaching *real* students, you will shine.  The thing is, you genuinely really, really *like* people.  That is something that most people don't have."

I felt like I was ready to go teach *real* students then, and here comes this morning, my very first Japanese class, JPNS 101.