Ahh...Friday night! The best time and day of the week! I was waiting for it all week. I've made it. I'm celebrating it with a real matcha, strawberries and leftover Valentine's Day chocolate. Ah, life has just become a bit more beautiful now.
This week went fast, and mann, I was busy! I don’t remember which day, but one day this week, I was
getting ready to go to school and I was in the bathroom, putting some make-ups on or
brushing my hair. I realized how untidy the bathroom was; clothes laying on the floor just as I took off before taking a shower, all the cosmetic stuff, earrings and rings were all mixed up, lying scattered next to the sink. I sighed looking at the mess and looked at
myself next. I looked tired and stressed. I was running late, and I didn't have time to tidy it up or lament the current state of being. I said to myself in the mirror, “Why am I always so busy, doing million things at a time! When will
I ever be not busy???” When will I ever have time to read all the books I want
to read that are on my kindle? Or movies I want to watch? The DVD’s on my dining table
keep piling up. The list of things I want to do when I'm free piles up while more new duties pile up even higher, catching up and eventually overtaking and swallowing all the fun part of my life before I know it.
I couldn't afford for just standing there thinking about it all day, so I grabbed socks (of which took forever to find the matching pair) and left my apartment. By the time I got to school, I realized that all my life, I'm always either really busy or sunk by absolute boredom, so I'm always on either side of two extremes, never comfortably busy or comfortably not busy. Well, I don't know if anybody can possibly relish the state of being "comfortably busy", but it's ironic that when I run out of things to do, meaning when I'm free, I don't know how to be "comfortably not busy." It should be easy, right? but I really don't know what to do. I only manage to glance at all the books and movies I'd put aside when I was too busy to do so, in hopes of indulging myself into them when I have the time to do so. Strangely, when I'm actually free, I don't feel like it anymore and kind of become unsure of what to do with all this free time in hand and sort of miss having million things to do and the state of busyness all together. Yeah, it's nuts.
Well, tonight, I tried to enjoy this state of being comfortably not so busy but ended up tidying up my room a bit while listening to Gotye, my recent discovered gem. Talked with mom and dad on Skype and later with mike. I will have to finish Chapter 4 tomorrow, so I'm gonna be hella busy again, and no, I won't complain. I will enjoy the state of busyness while it lasts and keep looking forward to next Friday.
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